There is something noble in the role of the "protector" or in that of the "head of the family," as long as these things are not taken as positions of shallow, bullying dictatorship. In our quest to redefine gender roles, it is no suprise to me that some modern men seem to be imitating the sexist stereotypes (like weakness and helplessness) they helped to create and that women seem to be putting on the masks of shallow agression that the worst of us dudes wear in our worst moments.īut being "manly" (strong and self-sufficient) is, again, in its purest form (the same way being "gentle" in its purest form is) a good thing. It is easier to create a cardboard cutout of one another and imitate that. I'd like us all to look at what is best in our respective traditional characteristics and choose those items, a la carte. I don't want men to be simpering wimps and I don't want women to be arrogant hammers. If we could all just come center, toward each other, instead of wanting to jump into each other's (ill-fitting) shoes, that would be great. But I do get the objection: those words out of the mouths of different man can carry different intentions and meanings. I like the idea of women being labeled "the gentler sex." I also understand that many women consider that a damaging diminutive, but, in the purest form, gentleness is a good thing. I know I am on dangerous ground here, but, there is nothing more profound than a mother's gentle affection. Men have a ton of awful qualities and maybe equality does not require women sharing these awful characteristics.
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(I also wish men did not want to be warriors, but that is our millenia-established hole to crawl out of.) It feels, to me, like children looking up to the playground bully. I wish women did not want to be warriors.
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(We'll get to men, in a minute - they do something similar.)įor instance: war is awful. Women and men are equal in their validity as human beings, to me, so, I often wonder why some women seem, in their important quest for complete social equality, to want to take on the worst of stereotypically mannish qualities. It always felt to me as if the women were trying to play men trying to be, if you will, "Ravel" when they should have remained "Gershwin" when both were equally different and equally great. I used to have a problem, on an artistic level, with the way actresses played women in positions of power - ships' captains on Star Trek, for instance or senators or soldiers. I wonder about what is happening in the minds of modern men and women. Supposedly, Ravel replied, "If you study with me, I can only teach you to be a bad Ravel you are already a great Gershwin." I don't know if this is a true story or an urban legend type thing, but my dad once told me that Gershwin asked to study composition with Ravel.